I was a poor teenager in the city all alone
with some change in my pocket but no women in my home.
I told my physician, he said, "This is not for me,
but here's the card of a magician whom you really ought to see."
I went to this sorcerer to cure me of my woes.
He said, "I've seen this problem before if it's what your aura shows:
You feel you're trapped within your lonely heart and there's no way out for you,
but there's really just one little thing you have to do:
Just drink this vial of satan's cum
and all of your dreams will come true.
Just guzzle down the semen of the great dark prince
and true love will come to you.
I drank down the vial and thanked this magic man,
he said, "Don't you leave so fast now, son; you owe me twenty grand."
I looked him in the eyes and said, "You must be kidding me"
He said, "Do you think I jack off Satan for free?"
I signed some sort of contract to forgive me of my debt
and now I have a sweetheart, pretty as one can get,
and a red-eyed baby boy who's just as smart as can be,
only two days old and he speaks Latin fluently.
Just drink a vial of Satan's cum
and all of your dreams will come true.
Just guzzle down the semen of the great dark prince,
and true love will come to you.
Joe Waine's dreamy, melodic release benefits the Seattle homeless population and the Italian people, two demographics hit hard by COVID-19. Bandcamp New & Notable Apr 9, 2020